0.03 Percent

I walked into a classroom the other day, and there wasn't much going on. 

I sat down and talked to a few kids, who were listening to music or playing on their phones.

"What do you want to be when you grow up" I asked, feeling kind of salty for raising such a generic question.

"A Physical Therapist" one kid said.  "Eeeew," giggled a few.  "You know they have to go 'down there.'"  I assumed "down there" meant penises and vagina's, so I reassured them that Physical Therapy doesn't really have a whole lot to do with below the belt.  (My guess is they were thinking of the physical exams they get which often time include a pap smear, etc).  

"What do you want to be," I asked a kind of roundish (i.e. overweight) young man, slouched in his chair, one headphone in.  "A basketball player," he said, with an uninterested/i-really-don't-give-a-fuck look.

I took a deep breath, because I knew I needed to proceed carefully.  

My first thought was to say, "If I had a dollar for every young black male who told me he wanted to be a professional athlete, I'd have quite a bit of money.... but if I had a dollar for every young black male who told me that AND lived to see/make it happen, I'd be broke." 

"Okay," I said.  "I want you to get online and look up what is the likeliness of that (playing pro ball) actually happening."  I thought if he did the research, maybe he could come to the conclusion that he may want to have a back up plan (i.e. an education, etc).  

I checked in with him a few days later, and he said he couldn't find an answer, and that he looked with his teacher too.  Apparently all they found was final four basketball bracket statistics.  I was impressed that he took the time to look, but disappointed he didn't find an answer.

Upon doing a very quick google search this morning, I came across a probability chart.  If this young man makes it to his senior year of high school and is playing ball, he has (assuming he's good) a 0.03% chance of playing professionally.

According to the Parents United for Public Schools Website, 36 % of African American males in Minnesota  (like the one who told me he wants to be a pro basketball player) will graduate high school.  I'm not as good at math as I used to be, but wouldn't then his 0.03% chance of playing ball be even less, because that number is assuming he makes it through high school. 

I want to have a conversation with this young man, and I'm not sure how to do it.  The odds are not in his favor.  Most, if not all of his teachers are white.  As an Indian female, I don't know how much my words will mean to him either, because I am not in his shoes.  I never have been, nor will I ever pretend to be.

I wish all the best for this young man, who will likely go somewhere if he is challenged in a positive way, and supported by his community (i.e. family, teachers, peers, coaches, etc).  I think it's okay to show him the website with the statistics...and from there, I selfishly hope he makes the choice to really look at his future and take the steps to make it meaningful for him.  

In an age where young black males are targeted, gunned down, and left behind in the classroom, I feel it's important to continue the conversation about education, racism, opportunity and achievement gaps.... but in doing so, making sure that the voices of those who are most affected are leading the conversations.  

I'm left wondering how I can help ensure that is happening, or if that's even what should be done?  

Meanwhile, I'm in my own set of shoes, fighting my own race/gender/sexuality/economic/educational battles...

Wearing a hoodie in honor, remembrance, and hope for Trayvon Martin and the future.  03.21.2012. 

Waiting....

I am wating for Kai to call me, so I can go into work. I am back, working part time with Books for the Future. So far, so good... I am enjoying my time working, and learning more about small businesses. I am still working at the group home, on Fridays, which is also good. It's fun seeing the consumers (and fellow coworkers) grow over time.

A week or two ago, I went out west (??) to Litchfield to visit Ardes Shea. I had seen her the week prior, with her family, but this time, I went out alone. We had a great visit together. We went to a small cafe in town for lunch (on a monday, I believe, monday the 12th of january). When we got to the cafe, there was a group of "retired school teachers" sitting at a table. They were all men. They seemed surprised to see me, which makes sense, as it is a small town.

A dude sat down with us, and didn't say much. He just wanted to say hi, and let his presence be know, I think. Anyhow, he said to Ardes (who is 87 years old), "I wish you would fall in love with me and we could run away together". Her response?

"I'd just assume join the army!!" It was hilarious! She is so "on point", for a woman of her age, and for just a human being in general.

We watched the news together, it was right after senator so and so said that Obama could get elected because he's light skinned and doesn't speak with a negro dialect or something like that. It was all over the news, and we soon got tired of it.

Ardes and I talked a lot about her experiences growing up. She's in a writers club, and it was awesome reading her stories. I shared stories with her about my grampa, and she encouraged me to write them down.

Speaking of writing...I am taking 2 classes this semester. One is with Tim Lensmire, and it's something about "Teaching Writing in the Classroom", with an emphasis on race (and how race/ethnicity plays a role in teaching writing). The other class is taught by Thom Swiss, and it's called "Teaching Creative Writing and Poetry" or something like that. I went to that class on Tuesday night. It seems cool....we will be doing a lot of our own writing and critiquing. That is good. The one thing I didn't like, is that of 18 kids in the class, 16 are White.

I'm not surprised by this...just disappointed. These are folks (myself included) who want to be teachers.... which is good, we need teachers, and good ones at that. The problem is, we (in the US) have a huge achievement gap between brown kids and white kids in terms of success in school. This starts at a young age, and can continue for a long time (even outside of school).

My issue/concern is that we need more teachers of color. We need more teachers who look like, or who have had similar experiences of their students. You can read all you want to about "Urban/Inner City Youth", or "Urban Education" or whatever the fuck.... but unless you actually dive in, meet kids, chill with kids, learn from kids.... all you're getting is a skewed perspective.

It's frustrating to me, because once again, I feel like I stick out, and if I want to speak up (in class), it will be difficult not to speak for "poor and brown people everywhere". I don't want that role. I am not that role. I mean, yes, I am poor, and I am brown.... but there should be more poor people and more brown people getting into education and teaching.

The problem is.... education fails poor and brown folks from the get go. It's a catch 22 I guess... we need more diverse/unique teachers to help "close the gap" and be role models for their students.... but the system is working against them almost immediately.

Time to go to work...